. . .



Mommy!  Abducted's being mean to me again!
  -AllonI Kramer

I can answer all your questions, because I am the font of all knowledge.  For 
understanding you must consult elsewhere, as my rates are exorbitant. For 
instance, did you know that Australians need a visa to visit the Czech Republic, 
but not New Zealanders?   How frightfully peculiar.
  -Derek Bradley

You've been jewed, blued, and tattooed. Ahem. Did that cross the tenuous border 
from acceptable abducted-level "just joshing" into the realms of the untenably 
offensive? Or must I try harder?
  -Nori Essen

Its because you Aussies lack brown, fuzzy outsides.

How fortunate that they have green, seedy insides.

  -ghostxxx 'n Chris  (what is?  does it matter?)

Damnit, Nathan, I FORGOT TO BRING YOU GRAVY!! I hope I made up for that by 
giving you the opportunity to try on my boyfriend's skirt..
  -Nori Essen

If it weren't for that fortune cookie last night that said "You will do good to 
expand your business" I'd think that me actually working at this company is a 
sign of the apocalypse.
  -Jennifer Lynn Larkin

The dog ate my homework has been replaced, in this day and age, with My computer 
crashed.  Which means:  Microsoft breeds dogs.
  -AllonI Kramer

School and I aren't getting along.  We have different goal.  School's goal is to 
give me a good grade and move me along.  My goal is to actually learn things.  
This annoys me.  Ideally, if I change to a 4year college at some point, they 
will make things difficult for me.  Then, I can bribe teachers with my body!  
Yay!
  -AllonI Kramer

Killing your obnoxious client is justifiable homocide, right? It may be a bad 
business decision, but it should still be legal. "I'm sorry, Your Honor, but she 
couldn't grasp that two things that are mutually exclusive can't be done 
together. She had killin' comin'."
  -Jennifer Lynn Larkin

Speaking of boink, although I've called my boyfriend "moosefucker" several 
times, he has yet to accuse me of being a moose.
  -Jennifer Lynn Larkin

Now that I think of it, Hunan Being _would_ be a good name for a goth Chinese 
takeout place, wouldn't it?

Hunan Being: All Your Philosophical Chinese Food Are Belong To Us

  -AllonI 'n Jennifer

You'll not embroil me in an "Access sucks" discussion. I'd rather argue the 
"Russia is big" controversy, Or maybe discuss  "Gin makes my tongue dance".
  -Dr. E. Von Obnox

Remind me to have you beheaded.

Have me beheaded.  You didn't mean later, did you?

Now will do.  *ka-SHUNK!*

Ow.

  -AllonI 'n Jennifer 'n AllonI 'n Jennifer

x-files last show spoiler: The theme to the X-Files is NOT A LOVE THEME. Bow 
chicka bow. Now *that*'s a love theme.
  -Jennifer Lynn Larkin

Troy, the CTO, owner of the curse of Troy: "Hey Nori. Can you open this package 
for me? I think it's a bomb. Can you keep it away from the development server?"
  -Jennifer Lynn Larkin

YOU ARE FAILING TO DISTRACT ME FROM WORK. Do better.
  -Jennifer Lynn Larkin

I just saw the most frightening thing I've seen in years. Celine Dion playing 
air guitar and doing the pelvic thrust while singing an AC/DC song. Damn it. Now 
I'm going to have to have my mind erased.
  -Jennifer Lynn Larkin

NO, goddamnit. Those multiple orgasms are MINE.
  -Nori Essen

I miss being sexually harassed by Nathan, damn it.
  -Jennifer Lynn Larkin