. . .



You need to be an expert with your ignorance.  It's Zen, baby.
  - Derek Bradley

Zen and the Art of exploding a remote server.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

It's Fascist Zen, baby.
  - Derek Bradley

Yosemite has some really big rocks. Just so you know.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

I'm feeling very bitter this morning.
  - nw

got me again, Jen. You are so right. I can't believe I was so dumb to think I 
could outwit you, oh super-queen of all knowledge. 
  - ghostxxx (this, by the way, is sarcasm)

I fear that I am close to the end. Every day I sit here, laughing and playing, 
until they find some new way to show me what I'm running from. Every day, they 
find something, and if they don't, I happily do. I find something horrifying, or 
disgusting, or disturbing, some hopeless part of me.

You're surfing the web again, aren't you?

  - nw 'n Jennifer

This is my prison.

And only you have the key.

He traded it to me for a snickers bar wrapper and bent paper clip. He kept 
rambling on about 'pain' this and 'I think I'm dying' that, but I just waved 
that paper clip in front of him and he folded like a origami swan.

  - nw 'n Jennifer 'n Jason

Be prepared to be an asshole and follow through.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

I just assumed you had a porn star or two tucked away somewhere...
  - nw (about JLL)

To paraphrase mr_urc, "Don't make me make you wear dresses." 
  - Nori Essen

Listen to the drama, Nathan. You are UberGoth. You live for the drama.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

And so I found myself sitting around in the dark well into the wee hours of the 
morning, listening to switchblade and joy division and lurking in chatrooms 
populated by gothic housewives and repressed adolescents. 
  - nw

I am a Tao of one.
  - nw

I just can't stay away. You're too sexy for words. I WANT YOUR BABIES! For 
lunch.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

Some people have too much time and too much access to technology.
  - Nori Essen

Well, since it sounds like you're basically proposing a crash-course in applied 
female psychology, yeah, I think an answer-key would be a good idea.
  - nw

If there are about 6 billion people in the planet, and most have more or less 
the same basic intelligence level, then we shouldn't be talking about averages 
anyway, we should be talking about medians. Because it is on medians that we 
should line them up as we drive over them in 22 wheel trucks.
  - Derek Bradley

Alright, damn you. I'll read about your damn dirty glass tubes. Damn you! 
Damn you to hell!
  - nw

Alloni is more like a skinny, hyperkinetic Jesus in a trenchcoat and top hat. 
  - Nori Essen  (i feel complimented)

Today's bit of mexican wisdom:  "Even if a monkey is dressed in silks, she's 
still a monkey."
  - nw

Golden Shower Whore has a certain charm about it, don't you think?
  - Chris Wayne

I'm Sugar Pussy. If that ain't class, I don't know what is.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

glass tubes? ... did someone mention glass tubes?
  - nw

Asspick.  Sweet, savory, delicious.
  - nw

I remember back in the schwa-abducted days, there would interest in ALIEN 
ARTIFACTS ON MARS! I am not talking the face here, which may or may not be a 
trick of lighting. I am talking MYSTERIOUS structures!
  - Gark Sommer (nostalgia)

My theory is equally valid, and I'd argue far more interesting: Ancient Martian 
Sandworms. Screw water on mars. I want to find the Spice.
  - nw

We are now in the Bush era. There is no more room for mystery, only pain.
  - nw

I am KING OF THE GOTHIC HOUSEWIVES!!!!!
  - nw

Must think of suitable punishment.  Must find my torture kit.  I think it's in 
storage, but appropriate substitutes can be found.
  - AllonI

Oh, hurray. Jennifer is making blatantly oblique references to her womanly 
plumbing. Film at 11.
  - nw

In ten days, on the 27th, I'll be born.  Make preparations to celebrate in 
whatever fashion appeals.  I recommend a Roman bacchanalia. As for myself, I 
intend to be crying as the doctor slaps my behind.
  - AllonI

She smiled softly and I chuckled slightly, and I opened my mouth to voice those 
three little words...  And then she was kidnapped by circus midgets.
  - nw (part of a continuing story)

You're part of a subsubculture. Yeehaw!
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

Is there anyone on this list who *ISN'T* a goth?
  - nw

I couldn't give a rat's arse about Apricots.
  - Derek Bradley  (and now you know)

You're just Alloni-- a subculture of one.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin  (yes, yes, i'm selfcentered, okay?)

Angest angst angst, glass tubes on mars, angst angst angst, please talk about 
glass tubes on mars, angst angst angst.  I post a comment re: glass tubes on 
mars AND an alternate theory, and I'm met with silence? Oy vey!
  - nw

do you ever get the feeling that the chinese are watching you?
  - nw

For some reason, I really want someone to braid my hair just now.  Very odd.
  - AllonI

I know where my priorities are:
men
dog
crawfish
Alloni
death
Interesting that those are also the steps in everyone's life.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

maybe they'll see my ginormous shlong and want to sleep with me
  - Funky J  (he can hope)

Anyone up for some crop circle construction? Cattle Mutilation?
  - Gark Sommer

Hey Muad'Dib! You left the fly open on your stillsuit again!  Kwisatz 
Assholderach!
  - Eric Gustafson

Bored enough to officially declare today Bad Alien Gothic Poetry Day.
  - nw

Pretty much all higher lifeforms are goth. Dolphins are perkigoth.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

Cylons : TechnoGoth
Sith : UberGoth
Wookies :  Nup, not goth, unless there is a HenryRollinsGoth 
Assorted beings from the Cthulu Mythos :  A little from column A, a little from 
column B
There maybe something in your theory, I'd like some Unversity to fund a Doctoral 
thesis to explore these themes.
  - Derek Bradley  (re: all higher lifeforms are goth)

It is hard to eat asparagus with a plastic fork. It would be *really* hard to 
eat asparagus with a plastic spork. I just thought you should be aware of 
pressing social issues like this one.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

I saw my friend get beat over the head with a 2 foot dildo at a concert 
recently.
  - ghostxxx

"I, ____, take this verb to be my husband, to fornicate and rectify, in penis 
and in soup."
  - Couple getting married at Burning Man Flipside, MadLibs style

Nude baby oil wrestling isn't as interesting as it sounds.
  - AllonI (what?  it's true!)

Generator powered Batman kills silently in the night of membranes when will it 
ever end?
  - Selene

ok, just watched a rather interesting thing on TV about hacking, and now I'm 
paranoid! want to know how safe my system is, but don't know where to start! any 
ideas?

Sure. I can help you out. Just move your head a little to the left so I can see 
the screen and then we'll get started.

  - Funky J 'n Chris Wayne

Someone please make it stop. Someone please make him stop. I should have eaten 
him after all. Someone please kill me.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

I realized today that the word pronounce contains the word pronoun.  Coincidence 
or conspiracy? Discuss.
  - Jennifer Lynn Larkin

Of course!  I'm an idiot!  This explains everything!
  - AllonI

Cannot parse.  Must translate to German: Sie wissen, erwartete ich eine bittere 
Antwort vom ghx vor jetzt. Ich werde entsetzt und shagrinned, da es warten 
mute, bis NACH RECHTS oben gezeigt.
  - Derek Bradley

Which begs the question: What kind of oil do nude babies wrestle in?
  - Chris Wayne

I like your life. Its simple. Let me have it so I can fuck it up. 
  - ghostxxx



Official Abducted Taunting Of The Month:  (nw)

"Leggo my eggo," I pleaded.

Jason just looked at me and laughed.

"Leggo my eggo," I implored, nearing tears as his grip tightened around my 
buttery, golden-brown goodness.

"Oh yes, my dear," he smiled, "I'll leggo. I'll leggo your eggo."

He leaned close, almost coiling himself around me, leaning in as if to whisper.

"Oh yes, my dear," he hissed, "but there will be... a PRICE!"