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The wrong color of electricity

A story needs certain things. It needs a beginning, middle, and end. Premise, development, climax. That's all there is to it.

The beginning should be something punchy. Get the audience's attention from the start. Bring some adventure into it, so no one gets bored and leaves the theater / puts down the book / changes the channel immediately. Like:

"It can't be!" John shouted loudly, as heads turned to listen. "It's all wrong! The electricity! The electricity is the wrong color!"

See that? We've established a mystery. Now everyone wants to know a) who John is, b) what happened to him, and c) why he's (presumably) running down the street shouting about the electricity. Keep them coming. That's where the middle comes in. The middle should take the themes created by the beginning, and explore them in interesting ways. Throw in some action, some pathos, and you're moving in the right direction. Feel free to change things on your audience to tweak with them. Everything already done must be kept, but there's no problem with creating expectations and then destroying them. So:

Few of them had heard John raving before, which made it a new thing. New things were highly prized in the Hall of Heads. The head on John's right ventured to say something to him. "My dear chap, what ever is the matter?"