. . .

That's it

The problem is that I have too many days attacking me at once.

So what I'm going to do right now is forget everything else and try to be mindless and annoyi... entertaining. In the hopes that by so doing I will feel better for a while. Kinda a zen thing. Nomind. Finding my center. Kiai!

Besides, I've got blocked outflow, and that's bad. Not blocked. Stopped. Just that nothing has been happening up here for a while. Avoiding scribbling avoiding thinking avoiding avoiding. Too too too bad. Could I? Possibly. Will I? Probably not. Still could happen, though.

Um, a man and three oysters walk into a bar. The bartender says Boing. Boing. Boing. This is you wakeup call, friend. Time to be one with everything. Hhaappppyy Jjooyy!! More efficient that way. No time wasted reading it twice.

Or you can skip characters, if you like, though I don't see the point, myself. Never have. It's one of my charms. Only one of the many cosmic ineffable charms I have, charms that would overcome the pull of gravity were it not for the fact that I dampen them to avoid being crushed by several billion people all rushing me at once at accelerations gration grater greater than 9.8 m/s/s. Even dampened, they're pretty strong. After all, I OWN YOU ALL I mean I am a fairly public figure on this mailing list, among other places. Gee gosh I'm a funny guy. Maybe I should go professional. You know, run for president.

Speaking of which, have I ever told you how much lovin' I have to give? I seem to be fixated on this subject just now. Must shift gears. Reverse is far too common at the moment. If I don't pull into first, at least, I'll have to drive backwards looking over my shoulder to get anywhere. I'm not, just now am I bitter I am bitter. Canst tell?

Nom ind no mind n omind. Not working. Never has. Think too much always thinking think too little never thinking. If I thought more I wouldn't be here. If I thought less I wouldn't be here. If wishes were fishes I'd walk to France. No reason. Wanna see the Louvre.

Got a gotta good strong dose o' the ol' stuff. It's addictive, y'know? Life without it... too hard to cope with unclouded. And when things go wrong... just blame the stuff. Easy easy. Easy as winking. Drugs? Course I'm talking about drugs. What else could I be talking about? Depression's a drug. Selfpity's a drug. Fear anger lonliness drugs drugs DRUGS. Specially lonliness. Hard habit to kick, lonliness.

Huh. Some forgetfulness I have. Remind me sometime to think less.

Remind me sometime to think more.

I have changed. I have. I remember earlier mes, earlier certainties. "I am myself and no one else." I still remember. But it's memory, not knowledge. I thought being here would being away from would being somewhere other than there would help. Has. Hasn't. Too many equals and opposites in my life. Remind me to no. To know? Playing with words. Words are labels. Pity them.

Huh. Mindless and entertaining I ain't. Well, if I didn't want to write this I wouldn't have written it. This has been a message from the Alloni broadcast system. Had this been an actual Alloni he'd probably have been more fun to be around.

Still, I feel better. C is for cookie, that's good enough for me.

Burroughs I ain't.

Pick one. Any one.